13 ways you'll annoy the parents of a new baby
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When your friend has a baby, it’s natural to want to visit her as soon as possible. Whether she wants you there is another matter entirely ...
Because there are certain strict - but unspoken - rules about visiting a new baby. Break any of them and you’ll be a very unwanted guest indeed.
From turning up with a cold to seriously outstaying your welcome, here’s a lighthearted look at the 13 ways you’ll annoy the parents of a newborn.
1 Turning up unannounced
Your friends have been inundated with visitors since they arrived home with their new baby.
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So in the first precious hour they have to themselves, they REALLY don’t want you turning up unannounced at their door.
Don’t be surprised if they don’t answer. Especially if you’ve rung the bell and broken another rule …
2 Waking the baby up
After being up all night, their baby is now sleeping peacefully.
Which is why the new parents are not impressed when you accidentally wake her up - either by ringing the doorbell or stage whispering 'HOW COMPLETELY GORGEOUS SHE IS'. Oops.
3 Turning up with a cold
Newborns pick up germs very easily. So turning up to visit with a cold is a huge no-no.
Expect to be turned away at the door by the protective new dad. And seriously, wait until you feel better before trying to visit again.
4 Ignoring the polite ‘no visitors’ note on the front door
Which is even laminated and clearly says ‘no visitors after 4pm’ - but you’re sure doesn’t apply to you, right? *Presses doorbell.*
5 Not realising when it’s time to leave
You’re beyond excited about meeting the baby and want all the gory details about how the birth went. But your friend is exhausted and - quite honestly - would rather be asleep than talk about her stitches. (Ouch).
Top tip: aim to stay no longer than an hour. And if she starts yawning before then, it’s definitely time to go.
6 Expecting a cup of tea
Your friend has just endured 24 hours of labour and is probably feeling pretty knackered and emotional.
Which means the last thing she wants to do right now is make you a cup of tea, no matter how far you’ve travelled to see her.
Even if she asks if you want one, insist on making it yourself - for both of you - or risk a serious friendship blip.
7 Arriving empty-handed
No, we’re not talking about presents.
Instead, never show up without the thing all parents of a newborn really want: take-away coffees and a homemade meal.
8 Not visiting
If there’s one thing worse than outstaying your welcome, it’s not visiting at all.
You might feel you’re doing the new parents a favour by giving them some time alone as a family.
Your friends, on the other hand, will be seriously offended that you aren’t interested in their new baby. If you’re a no-show, expect to be taken off the list of potential godparents ...
9 Not letting anyone else hold the baby while you’re there
Awww, newborns are so cute. But that doesn’t mean you can hold on to her for an hour while you visit the new parents, and refuse to hand her over to anyone else for a cuddle.
10 Offering too much ‘advice’
From breastfeeding to burping, you’ve been there, done that.
But that doesn’t mean your friend wants a running commentary of advice - no matter how helpful you’re trying to be - during your visit.
Instead, the best thing you can do is make her another cup of tea before heading off.
11 Not washing your hands when you arrive
You’ve just posted a status update on Facebook about meeting the new arrival … #blessed.
But given there are more germs on your smartphone than on a public loo seat according to a Which? study (ewww), you REALLY need to wash your hands at your mate’s house before holding her new baby.
And don’t hold back on the soap.
12 Picking up the baby without asking
Especially if she’s asleep in her moses basket.
If her parents are happy for you to have a cuddle, they’ll pass her to you. If not, you’ll have to make do with holding her gorgeous little hand.
Aah, you’d forgotten how perfect a newborn’s tiny fingers are ...
13 Posting photos on Facebook
You can’t resist taking loads of photos of your friend’s new baby.
But don’t commit the ultimate social media faux pas of posting them on Instagram before your mate has even shared her own photos. Oops.
How did you feel about visitors after giving birth? Why not join the chat in our Coffeehouse forum, below.
Need advice?
Our health visitors and nursery nurses are online Monday to Friday evenings to answer your queries on feeding, sleep and child health.