Mum ‘ruins’ child’s birthday party after daughter wasn’t invited
Louisa Sherlock
Associate EditorAnd she’s divided opinion among parents online – but is she in the right?
Birthday parties might be fun for kids but for parents, not so much. From sugar-high children to tears over party games, it’s often a huge relief when they’re over.
But the biggest stress is the guest list, especially if you’re limited on how many children you can invite.
One mum has taken to social media to share what happened when her daughter was left off the list … and what followed has seriously divided parents.
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'My daughter hadn’t received an invite'
Posting on Reddit, the mum explained that her 9-year-old daughter had recently stopped going to a book club with other children. However, she still considered the other girls as close friends.
That was until one, called Sarah, asked if she was invited to another of the girl’s birthday party. The mum wrote:
‘Sarah asked my daughter if she was excited to attend Addy’s, another girl in the class, birthday party. She said it was a swimming party and they’d be playing a movie on an outdoor screen. My daughter hadn’t received an invite.’
‘She didn’t expect us to find out'
Sarah’s mum suggested she contact Addy’s mum and ask whether she’d made a mistake with the invites. But apparently not …
‘She responded that they had hired someone to do a spa for the girls during the party and the service had a limit of 10 so they decided to only do the girls in the book club’, revealed the mum.
‘She didn’t expect us to find out. I responded that I understood, but felt it was wrong to not include just one. I told my daughter we can’t expect to be invited every time and this was just a life lesson.’
The mum explained she sent screenshots of their text conversation to Sarah's mum. And when Sarah saw the girl wasn’t invited, she decided not to send her daughter either.
'She felt I'd ruined her daughter's party'
And things escalated from there, with the mum adding, ‘I got a text from Addy’s mum a week later that 4 girls were not attending.
'She felt I had ruined her daughter's party and was creating drama. I explained that I had no intentions of ruining her party and had only spoken to one other mum about it.’
And she finished her post asking if she was in the wrong.
What do other parents say?
It's fair to say people are divided on social media, with many agreeing with the original poster.
One wrote, 'Totally agree that Addy’s mum created the drama the moment she chose to leave just one child out.'
And another posted, 'You don't exclude one kid from a party, it's unnecessarily cruel.'
Another parent shared their advice, writing, 'Our school has a rule that invites handed out in class must include everyone. Outside of school it’s your own choice.'
One praised Sarah's mum for refusing to send her own daughter, saying, 'I love Sarah's mom. She has class. She didn't tolerate that one girl was excluded in a small school/class/group. What an amazing woman. What an awesome spine she has.'
However one wrote, 'Some food for thought…Not invited? Don’t go. Not told? Don’t ask. Late invite? Decline, you were never a part of the plan.'
And another posted, 'You did indeed create drama, albeit unintentionally, simply by forwarding that private convo between you & Addy's mom. That was between you two, nobody else's business. As soon as you were told there was no oversight, that your daughter wasn't invited, you should have got right on planning something special for her.'
And one simply said, 'If not invited don’t ask. It’s that simple. Also sharing the screenshot was rude because it was a private convo.'
What do you think? Was she in the right? Join the conversation in our forum, below.
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