Ex going through my private stuff

We moved half a days drive from everyone we know a few years ago, my 14yo daughter’s mental health wasn’t great to start with and now her ocd is quite severe. Her dad comes down once every couple of months to see her as she can no longer stay with her dad (dads house isn’t clean and dad won’t accommodate the ocd) 

Thing is, her dad was at ours last weekend to see his daughter(he stays in a nearby air b n b) but I went out for the day on Sunday and left dad here waiting for our daughter to wake up (she’s nocturnal) and then he could spend some time with her until I got back. Her dad’s held a candle for me for some time which is a bit irritating but we can generally get on for everyone’s sake. 

When I got back, my daughter mentioned that her dad had woken her up by banging some cupboard doors, in front of her dad this was said. I said that’s fine I told your dad he could help himself to food and drink as I was out for a while. My daughter caught her dad going through drawers under my spare bed and also my wardrobe which is in my bedroom. Dad’s excuse was he was ‘bored’ 😬 😳? This all happened about five mins after I left the house. 

I suspect he was looking for evidence that I’ve got a partner, which considering the fact I’m virtually housebound and our daughters needs take up 24/7 of my time, I’d have a job!

When I left the room her dad said ‘you shouldn’t have told your mum I did that.’ ??? Our daughter is now being offish with me because I said her dads behaved inappropriately and won’t be trusted to stay here again without me here also. Daughter is prob embarrassed and tried sticking up for dad, saying he was just bored, I’m too easily offended.

I’m so grossed out by this! And fuming that he would tell our daughter she did wrong by not keeping it from me!! She also felt awkward telling me what he said when I left the room and was visibly struggling to confess to me what happened which is so wrong! 

I don’t want to betray her trust by speaking to him about this again. He obvs knows that I know. I’m not going to allow him to stay here alone again. What would you guys do? I’m not weird am I, this is totally over the line behaviour isn’t it? I might look in someone’s kitchen or bathroom cabinets if I’m at someone’s house but not a bedroom????