Is it bad to discipline 3 years old?
8 answers /
Last post: 16/02/2024 at 10:03 pm
My 3 year old son, told me he is “scared” of mummy. This morning I told him he cant use the ipad while having breakfast.
Hi Ethel
I'm Catherine, one of the Parent Supporters at Netmums. Thanks for sharing with you. You're wondering about disciplining your 3 year old. Ethel, it is important for kids to have boundaries in place and often it can help provide predictability which helps them to feel safe and secure. What can be really helpful however, is to focus on the behaviour you want to see in your child. Encouraging this positive behaviour, for example by using praise and rewards, can also build self esteem and confidence. This Netmums article may be a helpful read: Positive parenting - Netmums
Best wishes
Catherine
Hi Ethel
I'm Catherine, one of the Parent Supporters at Netmums. Thanks for sharing with you. You're wondering about disciplining your 3 year old. Ethel, it is important for kids to have boundaries in place and often it can help provide predictability which helps them to feel safe and secure. What can be really helpful however, is to focus on the behaviour you want to see in your child. Encouraging this positive behaviour, for example by using praise and rewards, can also build self esteem and confidence. This Netmums article may be a helpful read: Positive parenting - Netmums
Best wishes
Catherine
Thanks so much for your help.
He shouldn't be scared of you that's wrong but should know if doing something wrong will take something away. Being " scared " is not something my kids have ever said and they are 12 6 and 5. My kids aren't scared of me but know i won't allow bad behaviour I usually just sit with mine and ask what's made them sad or cross and its okay feel like that and we talk it through x I don't need take anything away or punish as we talk about it calmly and explain its okay get mad take 5 mins calm and then we will chat makes them very close to me x
Hi,Ethel!
Perhaps he used the word 'scared' because he hasn't yet got the vocabulary to use a more appropriate word(,such as 'upset' or 'frustrated') ,so perhaps he used this word in place of them because he had heard it before,rather than he was ACTUALLY 'scared' of you(if that makes sense!)? Please don't worry too much!🫂x
Hi,Ethel!
Perhaps he used the word 'scared' because he hasn't yet got the vocabulary to use a more appropriate word(,such as 'upset' or 'frustrated') ,so perhaps he used this word in place of them because he had heard it before,rather than he was ACTUALLY 'scared' of you(if that makes sense!)? Please don't worry too much!🫂x
Yes I would ageee with this too ….
Has he perhaps watched a TV show or film where a character has said they are scared ?
No he needs to learn societal rules.
Maybe you can change the part he is scared of you, but he might have meant at that moment. Did you ask him what he means by scared?
What are you actually doing to discipline your 3 year old?
Children need to learn right from wrong and also understand boundaries so you are absolutely not wrong for enforcing that, but that does depend on what you are doing. If you are shouting very loudly/ screaming or hitting then obviously that's not OK. But if you are just calmly but firmly telling them, or have other appropriate consequences for other behaviour then there's nothing wrong with that. Hopefully your lo isn't actually scared of you, that must feel pretty horrible to hear x
