14 year old son refusing to go to school
4 answers /
Last post: 22/02/2024 at 8:47 pm
Help 14 year old son rebelling so much refusing to go to school he will be 15 next month I am a single mum and at my wits end. He is in general a well behaved boy never been in any trouble goes to a very very good catholic school who have been so supportive. His dad is usless has never been a good role model what can I do?! Nothing is working he is 6 ft and just has no respect for me!
Have u asked him why is he getting bullied having problems ? Struggling with work or teachers if not take privileges away and don't let him out does he go out alot x
It's very important not to assume that he's being difiant and refusing to go to school.
There are a multitude of reasons that children struggle with school attendance issues and it's very important to try to get to the bottom of what is really going on.. . Could it be
Bullying, undiagnosed SEN, unmet needs?
Try to validate his feelings and speak to him about school. What is it he likes? Doesn't like? Try to go through each individual lesson does he like it? If not why not? Breaktime? lunchtime? Is there a pattern you can see with his absences? Take notes and see if there is anything there that could point to why he's struggling.
I have two secondary aged children who have struggled with school attendance and they are both now awaiting assessments for autism and ADHD, lots of the difficulties that they were having with school are because of issues around sensory difficulties and difficulties with concentration/memory and lack of support around these needs.
Get the info and approach the school, see what measures they can put in place to help. If you think he could be neurodiverse at all then look at getting assessments done.
Think of it as can't attend, not won't attend.
There is a brilliant and supportive group on Facebook that you may wish to join so many people go through this it's always nice to read other people's experiences and know you are not alone.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/NFISFamilySupport/?ref=share
Hi Annie
I'm Catherine, one of the Parent Supporters here at Netmums. Thanks for sharing with us. I can see you have had some support already from our community - hopefully you have found it helpful. Have you been able to chat to your son and ask him what is going on? Do you think that something may have happened, eg a fall out with friends or struggling to manage workload? Could he be feeling worried about something? It's good to hear school have been supportive so far so I wonder if you could ask if they have noticed anything too? You and your son might find the Young Minds website a useful resource - I'll link it here : School Anxiety and Refusal | Parent Guide to Support | YoungMinds
Take care
Catherine
